June 8th was National Best Friends Day and it got us thinking: What makes a best friend well, a best friend? Whether you prefer to keep just a handful of confidantes or hundreds of friends in your circle, there are always the ones that stand out — the kind you keep for life. BFFs, if you will.
So how do you define “best friend?” Is it that when you know, you know feeling — that moment when you think, hey, this person is meant to be in my life forever? Aside from that just knowing feeling, we spent some time thinking about what really defines a best friend. Here’s what we came up with.
Emotional support is number one in our books when it comes to best friendships. Emotional support means you know and understand each other on a deep level. The kind of friend that sympathizes and supports you when you’re down and celebrates with you during the good moments too.
Your best friend knows exactly when you’re out of sorts or feeling unsteady. She lets you be emotionally vulnerable when you need to be; she supports you, she boosts you up, and she’s there for you through thick and thin.
Together you amplify one another’s happiness. She’s always there for you and as her BFF, you’re there for her just the same.
You make time for each other. No matter how hectic your lives are, you always make time to shoot each other a text, give each other a call or plan some quality hang out time with one another. You automatically catalogue the things that happen in the day-to-day because you just have to tell them all about it and discuss in depth.
Whether it’s a wild night out, a quiet coffee at the neighbourhood cafe, or a quick video chat or text you always make quality time a priority. You know they add value to your life by being in it, and the feeling is mutual.
You Have Each Other’s Backs
No matter wha happens, you know she’ll be there, waiting to drive the getaway car. Ask her for a favour and she’s on it. She might grumble and moan her way through it sometimes, but you can always count on her to be there and make sure you get what you need. And in these moments, the ones where you need your friend the most, some of the most precious memories are created.
Memories are such an important part of a strong friendship and something we often celebrate for year’s to come as we revisit and sometimes even commemorate them.
You Listen to Each Other
Like really listen. She’s present as you hash out your day down to the most mundane details. And she’ll remember everything, too. When it comes to listening and supporting one another you know to spare no detail, you’re each other’s sounding boards. For life.
You Keep Each Other In Check
She knows your worst tendencies; you know when she has her head in the clouds or when she’s being too self-critical. Fact of the matter is that we all have our moments of overreaching or self-doubt. Your best friend knows who you are as a person and is always there to help bring you back to centre, sometimes without you even realizing it.
Secrets are meant to be told. At least to that one person you trust more than anyone else. Keeping secrets is emotionally draining and can manifest negative psychological and physical effects.
Your best friend is the one person you can trust, and she’s happy to share the load of this stress because you do the same for her.
Your best friend won’t spare your feelings. Well, she’ll try her best but when it comes down to it, she’ll let you know how she really feels but only because she has your best interests at heart.
She’ll be as diplomatic as possible, of course, but when you’re about to do something really questionable, she’ll let you know.
Best friends also disagree. *Gasp.* It’s true. Everyone is different, no matter how compatible they are, disagreements are often inevitable. Infrequent, maybe. But inevitable. In each other’s company, you know it’s a safe space to say your piece. You are both free to speak your mind with only the best intentions.
They Accept Your Worst and Make You Want to Be Better
Your friendship is a no judgement zone. Your relationship is built on who you are as people, for better or for worse, and strengthened by acceptance.
Whether you’re at your worst or your best, your best friend is accepting and supportive. They understand and nurture — and it’s that kind of relationship that makes you want to be better!
Friendships come and go but best friendships are different. It’s a hard one to break because you share a deep investment in each other’s successes and wellbeing. Your best friend is an extension of yourself and holds a place in your heart unlike any other.